Reflecting on a narrative conversation (a story of a story)

Reflecting upon my narrative conversation presentation and process, it is clear to me that my values informed my decision-making and the way I conducted myself and work when telling a story about a story.

To begin with, when deciding what questions to ask my interviewee, Sarah, my knowledge of her professional and personal background assisted in deciding which direction to take the interview as I already had the foundations to build upon to meet the requirements of the assessment. I asked Sarah to walk me through the development of her professional life from start to finish which led me into my next questions about her working values and the support around her. I found that each question led into the next seamlessly as I had prepared them in such a way.

Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com. Two people sitting opposite one another in a counselling room, one talking, the other taking notes on a clipboard.

I made and recorded my presentation on Canva, where I recorded my voice over slides and included snippets of the recorded phone interview I conducted with Sarah to show her exact words on certain topics. The themes that arose from the interview that were clearly related to Sarah’s personal values were loving your job, caring for people, that it’s never too late to learn a new skill or be part of a new industry, and being comfortable with change.

My expectations when beginning the interview process were that I would be able to conduct the interview quite comfortably. When my questions or the answers to those questions didn’t quite go to plan, pivoting to stay on topic was sometimes difficult. As Sarah didn’t know the background of the subject, this meant that it was difficult to get the answers that I wanted or to get her to elaborate in the way I needed. I often had to change my questions or prod her further to gain a deeper insight into her professional life.

Structuring the interview was made easier as I structured my questions around the recommended slide layout given by lecturer, Kate Bowles of BCM313 ‘The Future of Work’. The structure I undertook was asking about Sarah’s timeline of work, the turning point in her career, her hopes for the future and managing change. I then took my narrative story to connecting her journey to her club of life and values and finished with connecting these to theory discovered throughout the subject.

During the process, I felt comfortable as I already knew Sarah which assisted in connecting to her and being able to question her further or ask for clarification. I believe if I didn’t interview someone I already knew, it would have been more difficult to push for certain answers. I also believe that this previous connection with Sarah made her feel more comfortable and open as the interview was casual and non-intimidating.

I decided to record my presentation rather than present it live to ensure I could deliver my ideas in a more articulate way than I could presenting it live. Recording the presentation also allowed for a more seamless process on the day. Although it was more work upfront doing it this way as I had to record before the class, it relieved some pressure on the day as the work was already completed and all I had to do was answer questions at the end which also eased the anxiety around public speaking.

Although pre-recorded, the presentation was still a little uncomfortable as I was unsure if my ideas would translate to others’ in the class although we were learning about the same concepts and that I had fallen short compared to the others. I liked that we were able to choose which week we presented to the class as it eased so much pressure and allowed us to work around our other commitments and assignments. I liked the aspect of asking questions at the end of the presentations as it gave me room to expand on my thoughts as well as those who were delegated questions to think deeper and listen more actively to the presentations.

Photo by fauxels on Pexels.com. Person presenting to an audience, holding an iPad.

Through the principles of Michael White, such as externalising conversation and re-membering, the interview gave a greater insight into how values, both past and present form our identities through our experiences with other people, not only our interactions with them but how we see them and visualise our own identities through them.

Re-membering practices are based on the poststructuralist understanding that our identities are forged through our relationships with other people.

Maggie Carey & Shona Russell, Re-membering: commonly asked questions

Identifying my values through Sarah’s story was made clear through externalising conversation and outsider witnessing. By writing key phrases that intrigued or sparked my interest meant that these were elements in which I resonated with in some way. Phrases such as “caring for people”, “making a difference” and “conversing with people” were the main phrases I felt I resonated with most in my life, both personal and professional.

Through re-membering, Sarah was able to identify how her values were formed through the support of others within her club of life by reminiscing and reflecting on how these values have shaped her personal life and been further developed in her professional life. As Barbara Myerhoff (2007) states,

We are saying that our affairs matter, that we have not only a past, but because of that we have a future.

Upon reflection on the narrative process, the person I chose to interview had similar people values to myself. I find this interesting because I look up to these qualities that Sarah possesses. However, through the narrative interview process and outsider witnessing, I was able to identify that I possess similar values of caring and connecting to people which I have found a rewarding process overall.

Narrative Interview Process

References:

• Bowles, K., (2022). BCM313 ‘The Future of Work’
• Carey, M., & Russell, S., (2002). ‘Re-membering: commonly asked questions‘
• Myerhoff, B., (2007). Stories as Equipment for Living
• White, M., (2007). ‘Maps of Narrative Practice’

Listening with More Than Ears

Outsider witnessing involves noticing what you pick up in the stories of others and how this reflects your values as much as the story-teller themselves. Outsider witnessing has been used in therapeutic contexts, such as narrative therapy by “Enabling a person who is coming to therapy to invite friends or family members into their sessions as witnesses” as “it is much more likely that steps that a person makes in the therapy room can be translated into action in their daily lives” (Carey & Russell, 2003).

Applying the concept to professional contexts can assist to identify values within teams to frame how the future of work could look in optimising productivity and delegate appropriate roles to the appropriate people in alignment with these values.

Through externalising conversations and outsider witnessing, two guests, Ellenie (Elle) Petrou and Tom Bambrick shared their values through the stories they decided to tell about their experiences at work.

“Narrative and story become the way we imagine alternatives and create possibilities, and actualise these options.”

Harlene Anderson, 2007

As Elle (Senior Manager, Strategic Projects at University of Wollongong) explained the complexities of her work, including advising on recommendations for decision-making, she explained that “I need to really listen, I need to understand why they [other people in the organisation] believe it’s the right decision, and understand what is their goal?” Elle also explained that her role entails “helping people see situations using other views… to understand impact” which shows that Elle values fairness and equality of different opinions and people which she agreed when reflecting on her own values, “I’m the first person to put my hand up and question things.” Using outsider witnessing, these attributes about Elle resonated with me as it reflects my consistent effort of offering different perspectives when I’m working on a project or within a team at work.

When reflecting on her club of life, Elle identified that her “parents would definitely agree that I would step in if there was a crisis at home or an injustice.” The reason I resonated with this part of Elle’s storytelling is that my own club of life would agree that I am the first person to step in if there was something going on at home to resolve, no matter how big or small, but like Elle, not in an aggressive way, just to listen first and then offer differing perspectives which shows I value fairness.

“In maintaining our connection with our values we probably have all experienced the power of sharing those values with like-minded people. Outsider witnesses help to meet these two purposes – acknowledging our identity claims as valid, and sharing stories about what is important to us in life. In this way the people we work with come to experience themselves and their preferred identity claims as part of a community of acknowledgement..”

Hugh Fox, quoted in Maggie Carey & Shona Russell Outsider Witness: Some Answers to Commonly Answered Questions

When Tom (Global Academic Quality and Performance Specialist at UOW Global Enterprises) reflected on his own critical incident at work he described that “there was this decision-making paralysis like: Well who’s responsibility is this, because it doesn’t fit neatly into anybody else’s role”. He recounted that he likes to put his hand up in these situations to challenge himself and fill the “gaps in the system”. I resonated with Tom’s recollection of this story as similarly to Tom, I have been in situations at work where there was no clear outline on whose role it was to complete certain tasks and I put my hand up for the challenge and to fill the gap.

When Tom was reflecting on Elle’s story as an outsider witness, he stated, “I really liked when Elle spoke about calling on trusted individuals. I think for me that is something, when I’m faced with a problem that seems to threaten the organisation… that is my first thing that I do”. Tom also stated that what resonated with him about Elle’s story is that “the more that you can open up those doors, to getting more opinions in, the better the decision-making process, and the better the outcome”. These two key attributes Tom identified about Elle’s story are important as not only does it reflect Elle’s values at work, but it also identifies what Tom values and this is the key to outsider witnessing as a practice.

When Elle reflected on listening to Tom’s values, she identified that there were “commonalities around building relationships”. She also identified that Tom also “talks to people who challenge his ideas which resonates with me as well” and he was “talking about gaps in processes” which she plays a huge role in filling with her own projects at work.

Through being an outsider witness in Elle & Tom’s stories, three key values stood out to me that I also resonate within professional and broader, more personal settings.

• Multiple perspectives to achieve fairness
• Building relationships through trust
• Taking initiative to improving processes by proactively filling gaps

Overall, outsider witnessing principles help you notice people who openly validate you (which are referred to as communities of acknowledgement). Through listening to stories beyond the ear and using practices such as outsider witnessing, we reveal our true values both professionally and personally which contribute to the people we are now and will be in the future.

“We tell the story of who we were because we are making sense of how we are travelling towards the future”

Kate Bowles, 2022.

References:

Carey, M., & S., Russell (2003). ‘Outsider-witness practices: some answers to commonly asked questions’.

Bowles, K., (2022). ‘Week 4 workshop’ BCM313 The Future of Work.

Anderson, H., (2007). Collaborative therapy: Relationships and conversations that make a difference.

Stepping back in order to step forward

I have experienced some massive changes and disruptions in the workplace over the past 5 years. I have changed jobs, been bullied out of jobs and experienced major management changes but this story is a little different.

I recently started a job at the beginning of the year as a Marketing Assistant with a really cool company, which seeing as I applied for an unpaid internship, I was ecstatic about being offered a paid role instead. The team at this company are super supportive, really creative and all help each other out continuously which is just a dream as you can imagine. I was especially keen to show them my skills and develop them as well as grow as a person in this role, which is part-time. The company is based in Sydney which is sometimes a two hour drive one-way with traffic which can be taxing when you just want to be home and unwind at the end of a big day.

I was putting in some big days and trying to manage uni, looking after myself, going to the gym, cooking and house work, and manage some type of social life. Needless to say that I couldn’t manage it all. I was struggling to keep up with uni and going to the gym and even manage house work was being neglected altogether. Let alone a social interaction? Hardly, I would talk to my house mates and that was all I could fit in.

“Michael White (1997) then introduced the term ‘re-membering’ into narrative therapy
by developing the idea that people’s identities are shaped by what can be referred to as a
‘club of life‘ “.

Russell & Carey, 2002. Remembering: responding to commonly asked questions.

Typing on laptop.
Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com.

My family started to realise the impact it was having on me, even from living five hours away. My two closest club of life members, my Dad and my partner, started to ask me how everything was going and I just broke down. I thought I was managing it okay until they asked me this. I also had someone ask me “So you’re doing all of this, which is amazing, but when do you have time for play, for you?”

This question really stuck with me for a few days and I began to reflect really hard on the workload I was taking on and I realised if I kept going I was going to, not only miss out on making memories in my last semester of uni, but that I was going to burn-out completely.

I decided to externalise these thoughts and feelings with my Dad, which I then explained that I didn’t want to have to cut my uni down to part-time because I am almost finished and it would be silly not to get it done when I am so close. But I also didn’t want to cut down hours at work because I wanted to impress them in order to hopefully gain a full-time position when I graduate. My Dad listened and talked it out with me and offered a number of different perspectives to look at this from, one being, if I do all of this work for this company and they don’t offer me a position at the end of the year, I’ll regret slogging myself into the ground and not enjoying the little time I have left as a uni student.

My Dad allowed a space for me to look at my values and priorities and what is important to me.

“The taking of experience and attending to it and pondering it and putting it into a form means inevitably that we are taking a past, and taking a past that we agree—within ourselves or with others—has consequence. We are saying that our affairs matter, that we have not only a past, but because of that we have a future.”

Barbara Myerhoff, Stories as Equipment for Living (2007)

Having to call my boss and tell them that I was going to cut down my hours caused me a great deal of anxiety because I didn’t want them to think of me in a different light but the emotional labour of taking on a workload that you can’t sustain to the point of burn-out is a worse emotional toll. But I was finding it hard to even handle these emotions at work and not resent my amazing work colleagues because I was feeling overwhelmed.

Ultimately, my boss was really supportive and understanding about the situation and said that she was glad I spoke up when I did and didn’t allow it to get too bad that I couldn’t work at all.

My club of life helped me externalise the conversation of struggling to stay above water and allowed me a place to discover different perspectives of the narrative moving forward into the future chapters of my story. I am almost 2 weeks into cutting down my hours and am so much happier, fulfilled and feel like I can do basic tasks for myself again (uni is still crazy but at least I’m keeping up)!

Moral of the story, overworking yourself to the point of neglecting your priorities is not worth the ‘potential rewards’ you seek. You can still get to where you’re striving for by taking a step back and looking after yourself. These values I have now, of looking after my mental health first and foremost, I hope to continue to take throughout my professional journey into the future.

References:

• Russell, S. & Carey, M. (2003). ‘Remembering: responding to commonly asked questions’. Accessed 25th August 2022. Available at: http://narrativepractices.com.au/attach/pdf/Remembering_Common_Questions.pdf
• James, N. (1989) ‘Emotional labour: skill and work in the social regulation of feelings’. Accessed 25th August 2022. Available at: https://web-s-ebscohost-com.ezproxy.uow.edu.au/ehost/pdfviewer/pdfviewer?vid=0&sid=80e78364-c32a-4650-9047-3e879a295d27%40redis
• Myerhoff, B. (2007) ‘Stories as Equipment for Living’ Accessed 25th August (via BCM313 Lecture Slides)

Thinking of skills I have was harder than it seemed

So you’d think if you were asked to name a skill you have that it’d be pretty easy… well I had some trouble! Sure, I play sport and am heavily invested in health & fitness and my uni & work but I didn’t really consider these skills to be anything other than ordinary as they consume my everyday life.

Photo by fauxels on Pexels.com

However, a skill I named in class was working in the social media marketing space. I attained a paid job in the industry at the beginning of the year and I have loved learning and being part of the dynamic and ever-changing environment that it resides. I originally applied for an unpaid internship at this workplace and after showing them my portfolio, they saw potential in me to give me a marketing assistant role which obviously I was stoked about.

This potential they saw was due to my experience in the field such as my ability to create content, come up creative ideas, managing social media communities and experience with canva. These abilities and experience I attained through BCM’s digital artefacts and projects through creative freedom, practice, iteration and ideation which without, I probably wouldn’t have been offered the job I currently have.

So skills are never just attained from nowhere, through practice, early failure and fast iteration, I can do so much in the industry already and have set myself up for a future within a field I enjoy working in so much.